rolf's diary

Archive for the ‘borderline’ Category

Dear diary, how i do be confident?

In borderline, depresson, diary, self esteem on 26. July 2010 at 21:01

We are all human and have flaws. Even if your physicalappearance, unique personality, or social skills aren’t what you wish they were, that doesn’t have to stop you from being confident. Confidence translated literally from Latin means “to have faith in oneself”. You are beautiful inside and out so you should loveyourself unconditionally. Here’s how to believe in yourself.

  • Think for yourself. Very confident people know what they are doing is right, usually because they created an original thought rather than attempting to reproduce from an external source.
  • Make a list of special talents you have, or things you do that are good. Focusing on your attributes helps distract you from those parts of yourself that you think are flawed. It doesn’t have to be a specific skill or activity either; it can be an approach or an attitude that you champion through life. Do you always stay calm, cool and collected, even in hurried situations? Are you verypatient with people? Do you always see the humorous side of things? Are you always there for your friends?
  • Find your passion . Whether it’s baton twirling, martial arts, classic cars, musicianship, or basket weaving, you will feel confident pursuing that endeavor by recognizing what you enjoy doing the most. More importantly, you’ll be enjoying your progress.
  • Focus on Others. Try not to focus negatively on how you come across or how others mayperceive you. Instead, focus more on making other people happy, and that will build yourconfidence as other people start enjoying your company.
  • Take care of yourself. Eat a healthy diet. Don’t abuse your body, don’t overload it, and don’tdeny it any of the things it needs. At the same time, don’t obsess. Buying all the moisturizers, creams and conditioners will not bring you closer to who you want to be. Those things are only band-aids and make up. Confidence comes from within. Take the time to reflect on your life and do some emotional maintenance. In order to be truly confident, you absolutely must value yourself and understand that your well-being is important.
  • Work out. This is a real fast change. The gym can transform even the last geek. It will help you be who you are, and not be afraid of it. That’s the real confidence. Getting enough exercise can boost your confidence amazingly. Not only will it give you more energy throughout the day, but being in good physical shape will make you feel more “worthy” you could say, to talk to others and to be yourself.
  • Stick up for yourself. If people put you down (and not in a good-natured, joking way), then let them know that their opinion of you is not held by everyone—most of all yourself. This may, at first, be hard to do. But once you stick up for yourself a few times, your confidence builds and you get more adept at it.
  • Celebrate your individuality. If you know you’ve got something special or different, then embrace it; don’t hide it. That’s diversity. You may wish that you were taller, or shorter, skinnier,stronger, whatever the case may be. But you need to realize that, if you were like everyone else, then you wouldn’t be who you are. “What am I?” you ask; the answer’s easy: You’re a uniqueindividual who is capable of growing and learning.
  • Take action. It is surprising how powerful the simple step of taking an action can be. And the action you take need not be something extravagant or grand. It could be something as simple as tackling a task that you have been procrastinating, such as writing a letter or tidying up that corner of the garage that has been out of control for the last several months. It could also be something as interesting as taking a class in yoga, art, interior design, anything that interests you that you haven’t done yet. Whether large or small, action brings with it exhilaration, enthusiasm, and the confidence that other things can be done as well.
  • Improve your posture. Having good posture can actually make you feel more confident. Don’t slouch or slump your shoulders; nothing says “I lack confidence” more than a person who appears like they’re trying to hide from the world. Make sure that your back is straight, your shoulders are square, and your chest is puffed out slightly (but stay loose, otherwise you’ll appear stiff and uptight). Keep your chin up and your eyes forward rather than looking at the ground.
  • Make a conscious effort to smile often. A smile makes you appear warm, honest, friendly, and confident. You can also just relax your facial muscles entirely, which will make you appear calm and relaxed. Observe yourself in a mirror to make sure that you don’t have a tense or nervous facial expression, because if you do others will believe you to be sad, angry, or uncomfortable.
  • Make eye contact with others, especially when engaging in conversation. Gaze into the other person’s eyes as you talk to make yourself seem interested, calm, and confident. Avoiding eye contact makes you appear shy and submissive, while directly staring for too long may make you appear angry or scared. So the best advice is to gaze into a person’s eyes as you converse with them while occasionally shifting your gaze or looking around.
  • Control your hand motions. When it comes to gesturing with your hands, keeping your hands far apart and your palms open makes you appear open and honest. Pointing with your fingers and bringing your hands closer together can draw emphasis to what you are saying. Don’t overuse hand gestures or you’ll look nervous and unstable. Avoid wringing your hands or touching your sleeves, as these things can make you appear nervous, tense, or even dishonest.
  • Put a little strut into your walk. Move like you have a purpose, and keep your knees slightly bent to avoid appearing stiff and rigid.
  • Act confident, even if you don’t truly feel it. After a while, it will come naturally, and you will feel confident in yourself! Also, learn to not care what others think of you. If you let what people say to you bring you down, you will never be happy. Only care about how you feel about yourself, and don’t always take what people say at face value, because they may be jealous of you and are intending to put you down. Don’t let them stop your progress, but stand up for yourself whileacting calmly.
  • Smile and talk loudly and clearly, making jokes and being generally happy. Don’t moan or be over-confident people hate that so much.
  • Be kind to every one, even if you don’t like them. No matter who they are just be nice. That way, you will seem warm, friendly, caring and kind.

Dear diary, hack yourself!

In borderline, depression on 25. July 2010 at 22:39

You can be happy. You can live the life you want to live. You can become the person

hack yourself!

you want to be.

This is what I’ve figured out so far.

Stop assigning blame. This is the first step. Stop assigning blame and leave the past behind you.

You know whose fault it is that your life isn’t perfect. Your boss. Your teachers. Your ex-lovers. The ones who hurt you, the ones who abused you, the ones who left you bleeding. Or even yourself. You know whose fault it is — you’ve been telling yourself your whole life. Knowing whose fault it is that your life sucks is an excellent way to absolve yourself of any reponsibility for taking your life into your own hands.

Forget about it. Let it go. The past isn’t real. “That was in another country, and besides, the wench is dead.” If we’re not talking about something that is real and present and in your life right now, then it doesn’t matter. Nothing can be done about it. If nothing can be done about it, then don’t spend your energy dwelling on it — you have other things to do.

via hack yourself.

symptoms of borderline personality disorder (BPD)

In borderline on 25. July 2010 at 08:15

The main feature of borderline personality disorder (BPD) is apervasive pattern of instability in interpersonal relationships, self-image and emotions. People with borderline personality disorder are also usually very impulsive.

This disorder occurs in most by early adulthood. The unstable pattern of interacting with others has persisted for years and is usually closely related to the person’s self-image and early social interactions. The pattern is present in a variety of settings (e.g., not just at work or home) and often is accompanied by a similar lability (fluctuating back and forth, sometimes in a quick manner) in a person’s emotions and feelings. Relationships and the person’s emotion may often be characterized as being shallow.

more…

STOP trying to please others! #blog

In borderline, depression, self esteem on 23. July 2010 at 21:13

There is one thing you can do right now to improve your self-esteem: Do yourself a favour and stop trying to be everybody’s darling. That won’t work. Really. There always will be people who won’t like you. And that’s okay. So you can be truly yourself anyway. And there is another simple but profound truth: If you look after yourself first, if you take care of your own happiness FIRST, then it will become really easy for you to help other people in the second place. Because you then act from a position of power and strength.

10 reasons not to commit suicide #blog

In borderline, depression, diary on 22. July 2010 at 19:48

10 reasons not to commit suicide

If you’re reading this, there is at least a small part in you that doesn’t want to die. Listen to it, and please read on.

Suicide is final – once it’s done, there’s no changing your mind. Since you have even the slightest of doubts, you owe it to yourself to stay alive.

You can always kill yourself later, why not wait? Even if you wait just one day, you may find a reason not to kill yourself in the meantime.

If you’re feeling suicidal, you’re probably in more pain than you know how to handle. There are ways to reduce the pain, and ways to learn to deal with pain. You can learn both – either way things will get better.

Just because you’re feeling suicidal doesn’t mean you have to act on that feeling.

Consider this – if you’re trying to escape from the pain you are in and seek relief, suicide is not the answer. You cannot feel relief, or anything else for that matter, if you are dead. You must stay alive in order to feel the relief you seek.

Often when feeling suicidal you feel alone. You are not alone – you found us didn’t you? Turn to your family or friends or a priest or a rabbi – anyone that will listen. If you don’t know whom to turn to, use the links on the right-hand side of this page to find resources that can help.

By terminating your life right now, you terminate your future. Consider this – we create our own future. You have the power to create whatever future you wish for yourself. But you need to be alive in order to have that future.

If you’re sensitive enough to be in so much pain that you no longer want to live, you’re probably sensitive enough to care about, and want to help others. Maybe you don’t feel like helping anyone else right now, but why not help yourself? And perhaps by not killing yourself and overcoming your difficulties you can later help someone else who is in a similar situation.

Finally, don’t do it because I’m personally asking you not to. Whatever you’re feeling, whatever you’re going through, things can get better – I know because I’ve been there. Maybe I haven’t experienced exactly what you have, but not only have I thought of suicide, I tried it – thankfully I was unsuccessful and I can speak from personal experience when I tell you things can get better.

via The Bright Side – Support & resources for coping with depression, grief, suicide, mental illness, and emotional crisis – Wings of Support.

The Bright Side

In borderline, depression, diary on 22. July 2010 at 19:38

Welcome to The Bright Side

The Bright Side was created as a means of support – whether you are dealing with depression, grief, suicide, mental illness, emotional crisis, or are just feeling overwhelmed with life, you are not alone! We all go through difficult periods in our lives, when everyday life feels like it’s just too much to bear. A little support can go a long way towards helping us cope – and that is what The Bright Side is all about. On The Bright Side you will find educational materials, articles by top experts, personal stories, and other resources to help you cope with depression, grief, suicide, or whatever mental or emotional difficulty you or your loved one may be experiencing.

via The Bright Side – Support & resources for coping with depression, grief, suicide, mental illness, and emotional crisis – Wings of Support.

dear diary, breakfast!

In borderline, depression, diary, self esteem on 22. July 2010 at 09:10

to improve my self-esteem and self-confidence thru my illness includes a sensible nutrition. it’s important to increase the serotonin level.  since a couple of days i eat more fruits and vegetables. this morning i have eaten only tomatoes and cucumber without dressing, only salt. i drank coffee without milk and sugar.  as a side effect i have lost weight.

for an increasing serotonin level i do 5 times a week sport exercises.

meanwhile i feel me better on this way.

dear diary, what day is today? wednesday?

In borderline, depression, self esteem on 21. July 2010 at 07:13

i have started a new diet for improve my mental health. i eat only fruits and vegetable for a couples of days and i do harder train my ABS. it shall pushing my serotonin level. and it works. i have lose weight and my thoughts are today not so bad like last week.but now all my muscles hurts.

i feel like on the top of the world.

yesterday i have seen my kids for the first time since a couple of weeks. i’m glad about this and i hope of a good progress in building a better relationship with my daughter lena and my son deniz. i love them. and i miss them every second of my life.

this morning my smartphone is giving up the life completly. and i can’t buy a new. it’s terrible for me.

Depression: Tips to Help Yours…

In borderline, depression on 21. July 2010 at 05:38

Be With Others

Don’t isolate yourself—you’ll only feel worse. Try to be with other people. And take part in fun activities when you can. Go to a movie, ballgame, religious service, or social event. Talk openly with people you can trust. And accept help when it’s offered.

Keep Your Perspective

  • Depression can cloud your judgment. So wait until you feel better before making major life decisions, such as changing jobs, moving, or getting married or divorced.
  • This illness is not your fault. Don’t blame yourself for your depression.
  • Recovering from depression is a process. Don’t be discouraged if it takes some time to feel better.
  • Depression saps your energy and concentration. So you won’t be able to do all the things you used to do. Set small goals and do what you can.

Take Care of Your Body

People with depression often lose the desire to take care of themselves. That only makes their problems worse. During treatment and afterward, make a point to:

  • Exercise. It’s a great way to take care of your body. And studies have shown that exercise helps fight depression.
  • Avoid drugs and alcohol. These may ease the pain in the short term. But they’ll only make your problems worse in the long run.
  • Get relief from stress. Ask your healthcare provider for relaxation exercises and techniques to help relieve stress.
  • Eat right. A balanced and healthy diet helps keep your body healthy.

Shocking Statistics About Depression

In borderline, diary, self esteem on 21. July 2010 at 05:20

As a young girl, I thought no one felt the way I did. I wondered, Do other children feel this way? This loneliness? These bursts of self hatred?”

The statistics are scary.

18.8 million American adults (That’s 9.5%) of the population are suffering from depressive disorders. [SOURCE]

2% of Preschoolers are clinically depressed. Meaning, one in every fifty preschool student is chronically depressed. [SOURCE]

via Shocking Statistics About Depression | healthkicker.